DAWN OF THE
Feo Zombie: Argh... ugh...
Zombie Friend: Uhhh... Huhhh...
- TRANSLATING -
Zombie Friend: What's wrong, thing?
Feo Zombie: Having a bad day.
Zombie Friend: Let's go eat some people, you'll feel better!
Feo Zombie: No, that's the point. I've been eating people all day. It's just... just... sigh...
Zombie Friend: What?
Feo Zombie: I mean, look at this day! It's a beautiful day to make them scream, right?
Zombie Friend: Oh yeah! Love to hear them scream! Really makes the afterlife all worth while, you know?
Feo Zombie: So what happens after killing five - 5 - people?
Zombie Friend: What? They didn't scream? Not one? No way!
Feo Zombie: It's true! The first one was so scared she couldn't move - Not even make a peep! The second one died gasping. Well, okay, that was my fault. I shouldn't have started things off by ripping her heart out.
Zombie Friend: Yeah. There's a technique to killing.
Feo Zombie: Yeah, yeah. The third one-
Zombie Friend: More of an art, actually.
Feo Zombie: Gotcha. The third one-
Zombie Friend: Finesse, you know. Just sayin'.
Feo Zombie:- ahem! - The THIRD One... he kinda squealed.
Zombie Friend: Ew! Yeah, not really a scream.
Feo Zombie: Yeah, right? An embarrassing way to go. I think he knew it: felt bad about it. The fourth one just kept shouting until I finally chewed his throat out.
Zombie Friend: Yeah, those shouters can be annoying.
Feo Zombie: But the fifth was the worst! Ugh!
Zombie Friend: What? What'd he do?
Feo Zombie: The son of a bitch ran right up to me and laughed the whole time I was killing him!
Zombie Friend: Oh? Ohhh...
Feo Zombie: Of course, by that time I was stuffed and could barely eat past just the, you know, infection point. But he was laughing! He wanted to be a zombie!
Zombie Friend: Ahh... Well... - ahem! - In my defense, it was my lifelong ambition, and you knew that before you turned, so -
Feo Zombie: Just. Just shut up. You're not helping.
Thanks for the inspiration from Dave Reda!
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